Recently I heard a father of several children give a speech for Toastmasters. In this talk, he described getting his five children ready for an outing. Several children were more concerned about telling their siblings what to do rather than preparing themselves to get ready. In frustration, the father yelled, "Stop!" When he had full attention, he pointed to each child and said, "You do you, you do you, you do you and you do you."
Do you find yourself more engaged in what others do
rather than exploring your own life, your own style, your own form of happiness.
Rachel Cruze in her book, "Love Your Life, Not Theirs", opens with a story about a how a happy vacation turned sour. Rachel and her husband planned their first getaway since their honeymoon. They decided on Charleston, South Carolina, where friends enjoyed this "storied coastal town." They planned how long, what restaurants and squeezed every dollar out of their budget for this dream trip. It took months to save the money, they made reservations and planned the weekend practically down to the minute.
The weekend turned out to be all that they'd hoped - "the culture, elegance, and history." They decided then and there that this would be a place that they'd come back to again and again.
Here's where the nightmare begins. Upon returning, Rachel scrolled through her Instagram feeds. She noticed a feed about a fashion bloggers trip to Greece. Suddenly Rachel's. "warm glow" from her fabulous trip to Charleston was fading fast. She looked up airline tickets to Greece.
She had entered the comparison game - allowing a stranger's exciting vacation to steal the joy that she felt about her trip to Charleston. Her trip felt inadequate.
Do you spend your money in a way that is exciting to you rather than what is considered fashionable, cool or otherwise socially "acceptable"? Rachel Cruz calls the later, "Chasing Make-Believe". Do you fall into this comparison trap?
Try this:
Determine how you spend your money and whether or not you are gaining fulfillment in your life from those purchases. Yes, this will involve tracking. Your reward for doing this step? You’ll start to gain clarity, congruency and you will be able to DO YOU.